. . .it is good to "give thanks unto the LORD; for he is good: because his mercy endureth for ever." -Psalm 118:1
Our family has had a roller coaster for the past couple of months. We had two dear girls visit us in August. When they left we were getting all excited about visiting dear friends on the other side of the continent. Two days before departure we found out we were expecting a baby. WHAT!? some of you may say. That is exactly what we were thinking. Since it has been 10 years since we had a miscarriage and we have never been able to conceive since, I had pretty much decided that we never would. So you can only imagine the disbelief. We left on our trip with excitement building. Can you imagine? After 10 years. . .but it still seemed too soon to even believe. I was so glad that we had plans for 10 days or so. The midwife told me that I couldn't have an ultrasound to look for heartbeat until 8 weeks. So after a WONDERFUL time of visiting with friends, we arrived home safe and sound. How exciting to go to the hospital that day to see our little heartbeat. Only there wasn't one. Don't worry they said. You just aren't as far along as we thought. Only 6 weeks instead of 8. That sounded like a stretch, but we wanted it to be true. Oh, yeah! You bet we did. We prayed a lot. They scheduled me to come back in for another ultrasound in 3 weeks. Well I didn't make it that far. Two weeks later, because of spotting I went in. Still measured 6. We were crushed. There have been lots of whys. LOTS of whys. Why after 10 years did this happen? The next day, we lost our baby. So all of it has been so unreal. Through it all, God has been with us. I haven't always found it easy to say this. I have wondered at times where He was, but He has constantly sent me signs that HE IS. I haven't been so good and accepting as I wish I could, but healing is coming. God is so good. Counting my blessings now is so important. Last Sunday we heard a message about how it is okay to ask why, but just don't get bogged down in it. I think I had been guilty of getting bogged down in my whys. What a good reminder. We have SO MANY blessings. . .
...
166 - a new nephew
167 - kiddos and cousins
168 - summer sisters
169 - kiddos enjoying school lessons
170 - puppy love
171 - first visit to a cavern as a family
172 - saying good-bye to pups after finding homes for them
173 - visiting friends
174 - loosing teeth
175 - help with the dishes
176 - seeing God when my heart is breaking
